mimi: clothing again...i'm sorry, but it's necessary.

alright, yes, i am going to write about fashion faux pas' again. i'm not really sorry though because let's be honest, most of us deal with these on a day to day basis. it may be a friend, family member, stranger, or even your own sad closet situation...but they do exist and they do need to be discussed at length (at least in my opinion, they do). today's topic of discussion: everyday pieces of clothing/accessories that people buy in ridiculous colors, yet still wear everyday. if you own something that is meant for everyday use, then it probably shouldnt be neon pink (yes, this is me saying this), teal, pastel (which is really ugly and unacceptable in any case, but if you must), bright yellow, lime green, the list goes on....

in order to give you dear readers a better description of this dilemma, i will leave you with a list of clothing/accessories that if you must own in a crazy color, then you must own at least two.

1. northface: ahh the northface, every jappy northern girls go to jacket come the months of october through march. what was once a jacket meant for serious skiers has now been reduced to a tweens must have item. while the jacket does come in a variety of colors and patterns, it is a known fact that you should own one in gray, black, brown, white, or red (but even thats a stretch) before venturing out into the world that is the northface rainbow. if you insist on owning a northface in pink, aqua, yellow, etc. then please, please, please for the sake of your friends and family do NOT wear it every day. you are not on the slopes. if you fall down and cant get up, there are people around to help you. you will not need to be located by helicopter before the bears and coyotes get you. therefore, that lime green and pastel pink striped northface should only be allowed to see the light of day about once every two weeks, end of story.

2. ugg boots: actually i refuse to even discuss these, because if you still wear ugg boots then potentially i want nothing to do with you.

3. gloves: gloves, what a weird, but awesome accessory. perfect for driving cars without heated steering wheels and forming weapons of death (aka snowballs). otherwise gloves, you may or may not be useless unless i am climbing mount everest. here's the point....if you must be one of those people who wears gloves everyday, then please do not be the girl who wears the orange gloves everyday. no one wants to be her friend, at least not when she is in the gloves....and yes, they will be referred to as THE gloves. i actually think it should be a law that gloves only be sold in black, brown, and gray. of course, that law would exclude fingerless gloves because fingerless gloves are almost always worn in jest (and never everyday) so they are more fun when bought in a variety of colors. in fact, this rule may work backwards for fingerless gloves; only leather fingerless gloves should come in brown, black, or gray.

4. earrings: potentially, one of the most fun accessories a girl (or guy) can own. they come in a variety of colors, shapes, and sizes, as they should. i, myself, own black pirate ships, large colorful hoops, and gold shiny spirals (for the holidays duhhh). but then again, i also own simple studs. it becomes a serious problem when the only earrings you walk out of your house in are large blue balls with pink polka dots or bumble bee guitar picks. wearing the same eccentric earrings everyday makes you potentially insane, not an individual. the only person who can get away with wearing the same absurd ear baubles everyday is luna lovegood (see harry potter characters)....otherwise for the sake of all involved please refrain from wearing the zebras all the time.

5. flip-flops: ok, ok, i wont lie when old navy used to (i say used to because honestly i havent been in there in years, the cut of their clothing does nothing for my figure, but i digress) sell the flip-flops in every color...well, yes, i owned them in every damn color. then again, that would include brown, black, and gray so i was still following my own rules, thank god. anyway, flip-flops are fun in a multitude of colors, i will give you that, but you shouldn't wear the neon pink ones every day. in fact you might just want to save those for the beach/pool/barbie costume. brown/black flip-flops pretty much match any outfit and therefore, should be the go to ones in your collection. do not, i repeat do not, wear the orangey-orange ones out on a dinner date even if they do match your outfit. ughhh tacky. and boys...please stay away from flip-flops, which fall on any piece of the color spectrum...it just looks, well, lame.

so there you have it....a brief list of items which must be owned in multiples if they are to be owned in a variety of colors. i hope you just got a little bit more fashion conscious aka you can thank me later. thank god i finally got to say aka once in this post.


ahhhhh i'm out.
mimi.

post script: cds i bought today....lily allen, bloc party, and lady gaga (hey, you can't knock the gog's; she has mastered the art of being pantless).