let's be honest, the inclusion or lack of sauce can make or break any, no ANY, meal. french fries always need sauce; ketchup, mustard, bbq, etc. if you think otherwise, then please stop reading now as you are not the type of person that i wish to associate with, including through my blog. back to the sauce though, the type of sauce you use can also tell a lot about the kind of person you are. for instance, buffalo wings, are you a blue cheese or a ranch or do you live dangerously.....lack of sauce!! oh, that hurts my tongue even just to think about.
now, i have searched the sauce world up and down...you might call me a connoisseur of sorts. i've had your spicy mustards, your soys, your multitude of salad dressings (yes, salad dressings are classified as sauces and if you must discuss, then by all means comment below.....this is just a ruse to get you to comment). that last sentence wasn't really a sentence, but i didnt know where it was going so i just stuck a period on the end. i've even had heinz 57, which is also a discussion for another time since it is a weird mixture of bbq and ketchup and im not quite that its existence should continue. my go to sauce though is hot sauce....really any variety will do, but if i had to choose, well, cholula would be the best. anybody who knows and understands sauce would agree.
the point of this blog...about three years ago i found the god of all sauces. basically, this sauce is a reason to stop using other sauces altogether, except maybe salad dressings. it is perfect with almost any kind of food that might indeed call for a sauce. this magical sauce of all sauces is wendy's buffalo ranch sauce. it is pure joy. it is the perfect mixture of hot buffalo and mild ranch. it is slightly bizarre, yet quite amazing. really, it is just the perfect sauce...hands down, barnone, no ifs ands or buts about it. no ors about it either. but i digress.
still the main point of this blog....wendys' in multiple states do not supply this sauce anymore. tennessee and new jersey are both included on this list of states, which is unfortunate, since i spend most of my time in them. at first, i thought that maybe the wendys in nashville that i always went to just happened to be continuously out since others must have been experiencing the same love affair which i was. one day i asked though, and sadness of all sadnesses they replied that they didn't carry the sauce anymore, nor did any other wendy's in the area. i shortly learned that the same went for jers. one time about six months after this realization, i found the sauce in georgia. it was a glorious day...filled with many fries and lots of sauce. i did not have the foresight to buy more than necessary though, and upon my return to nashville, i was once again left sauceless. even worse, the next time i was in georgia, the wendy's there did not have the sauce either!
for the past year, i have thought all hope was lost. i figured that i would never taste my utopian sauce again. sadness did abound and it was not good. i went back to the old sauces, but they were no longer goodies. they were just lacking when compared with the buffalo ranch. i considered this to be the end of my sauce days. the end of a long and cultivated relationship....but then ali (yes the one and only) saved me! she found a wendys in kentucky which carried the sauce, bought ten, and brought them to me! now i will have the sauce for the next two weeks and life could not be looking any better. also she brought me a book full of sauce recipes so i will never be sauceless again. and who knows, i may even create my own buffalo ranch, which i promise to never discontinue.
that's all,
mimi.
post script: i am sincerely sorry in my complete lack of comma sensibility. it is horrible, but you must deal.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Saturday, January 24, 2009
ali: columbus, ohio - radio capital of the world.
road trips are an interesting conundrum for me: i can only listen to the “wicked” soundtrack ten or twelve times on repeat without wanting to kill myself, so occasionally i attempt to listen to local radio stations. i must be a glutton for punishment, because as awful as it is every time, i do it over and over again. today, i happened across the city with literally the worst radio stations in the world: columbus, ohio. complaints are as follows:
a. 93.3, congratulations on being the only radio station worth listening to. with both "momentary lapse of reason" by pink floyd and "peaceful easy feeling" by the eagles, i thoroughly enjoyed the two songs i heard while listening to your radio station for 30 minutes. one song + ten minutes of commercials + another song + another ten minutes of commercials = not a great programming choice.
b. paula cole, circa 1997 - i have never hated a song more than "i don't wanna wait," a.k.a the dawson's creek theme song. i very distinctly remember being with my mom in the car at approximately age 12 (must have been at least 12, she was letting me sit in the front seat), and telling her that i HATED that freaking paula cole song that played on the radio every 30 seconds. also, that was right around when mtv was super-cool and still played music videos, and the music video was all about a woman who was immortal but all of her husbands died. that is to say, it sucked. (the only other music video i remember so much detail about is something by sugar ray because i had a super-huge crush on mark mcgrath and watched it 600 times around age 13.) the point of all this is to tell you, how much i hate that song, and also how many times i heard it in the greater columbus area: 3. on 3 different radio stations. congratulation, columbus, you are about a decade behind the b-lo, which is at least a decade behind the rest of the world.
c. as much as i love snow patrol, the complete overplaying of "chasing cars" last summer made me want to walk into the kiss 98.5 studio and punch donny walker right in the face. the only good thing about that song was in kristen's momentum dance, when she jumped off some girl's back and "burst into life," which i thought was hilarious. i obviously heard it twice, on what amounted to be the Columbus “indie” radio stations that played nothing but whiny emo music that everyone in civilization was tired of a year ago,
d. you can usually count on southern ohio for some good 'ole country music, but there was literally none to be had today. normally i'm a big fan of hank williams, jr., but the song, "i'm for love" was just not doing it for me. google the lyrics, please see how ridiculous it is. and that is the best song that i heard while flipping between their 16 country music stations.
e. religious radio in multiple forms: besides the crazy preachers and random choirs, religious rock is not only strangely popular, but also the weirdest shit ever. It's like a bad creed rip-off (creed being a bad rip-off of smashing pumpkins and nirvana) with some more metal thrown in for good measure, and to top it all off - lyrics like "i just wanna praise you." i can't be the only one that finds that scary.
needless to say, i can't waaaiiittt to be able to hear 107.5 thaaa rivahhh. just a few more hours of tedious driving and bad music.
ps. speaking of radio stations, the lack of creativity with naming your segments drives me crazy. everyone calls rush hour "the drive at five," like, duh, my 10 year old cousin could have come up with that. star 102.5 used to call it "the 5 o'clock traffic jam," they would play a bunch of songs without commercials, and i thought that was great. i don't know if they call it that anymore because i don't listen to that station for the following reason: star 102.5 plays all christmas music during the month of december, which is the most annoying thing EVER, and i am boycotting them until they stop doing that.
pps. spotted: sign on the highway right before attica state prison (one of the few "supermax" prisons in the us where people like mark david chapman and the son of sam reside), which states "correctional facility area - do not pick up hitchhikers." like, thanks so much, new york state, i was thinking that murderers made great traveling companions, but now that i've seen your tiny little yellow sign, all that has changed. two thumbs way uppp.
a. 93.3, congratulations on being the only radio station worth listening to. with both "momentary lapse of reason" by pink floyd and "peaceful easy feeling" by the eagles, i thoroughly enjoyed the two songs i heard while listening to your radio station for 30 minutes. one song + ten minutes of commercials + another song + another ten minutes of commercials = not a great programming choice.
b. paula cole, circa 1997 - i have never hated a song more than "i don't wanna wait," a.k.a the dawson's creek theme song. i very distinctly remember being with my mom in the car at approximately age 12 (must have been at least 12, she was letting me sit in the front seat), and telling her that i HATED that freaking paula cole song that played on the radio every 30 seconds. also, that was right around when mtv was super-cool and still played music videos, and the music video was all about a woman who was immortal but all of her husbands died. that is to say, it sucked. (the only other music video i remember so much detail about is something by sugar ray because i had a super-huge crush on mark mcgrath and watched it 600 times around age 13.) the point of all this is to tell you, how much i hate that song, and also how many times i heard it in the greater columbus area: 3. on 3 different radio stations. congratulation, columbus, you are about a decade behind the b-lo, which is at least a decade behind the rest of the world.
c. as much as i love snow patrol, the complete overplaying of "chasing cars" last summer made me want to walk into the kiss 98.5 studio and punch donny walker right in the face. the only good thing about that song was in kristen's momentum dance, when she jumped off some girl's back and "burst into life," which i thought was hilarious. i obviously heard it twice, on what amounted to be the Columbus “indie” radio stations that played nothing but whiny emo music that everyone in civilization was tired of a year ago,
d. you can usually count on southern ohio for some good 'ole country music, but there was literally none to be had today. normally i'm a big fan of hank williams, jr., but the song, "i'm for love" was just not doing it for me. google the lyrics, please see how ridiculous it is. and that is the best song that i heard while flipping between their 16 country music stations.
e. religious radio in multiple forms: besides the crazy preachers and random choirs, religious rock is not only strangely popular, but also the weirdest shit ever. It's like a bad creed rip-off (creed being a bad rip-off of smashing pumpkins and nirvana) with some more metal thrown in for good measure, and to top it all off - lyrics like "i just wanna praise you." i can't be the only one that finds that scary.
needless to say, i can't waaaiiittt to be able to hear 107.5 thaaa rivahhh. just a few more hours of tedious driving and bad music.
ps. speaking of radio stations, the lack of creativity with naming your segments drives me crazy. everyone calls rush hour "the drive at five," like, duh, my 10 year old cousin could have come up with that. star 102.5 used to call it "the 5 o'clock traffic jam," they would play a bunch of songs without commercials, and i thought that was great. i don't know if they call it that anymore because i don't listen to that station for the following reason: star 102.5 plays all christmas music during the month of december, which is the most annoying thing EVER, and i am boycotting them until they stop doing that.
pps. spotted: sign on the highway right before attica state prison (one of the few "supermax" prisons in the us where people like mark david chapman and the son of sam reside), which states "correctional facility area - do not pick up hitchhikers." like, thanks so much, new york state, i was thinking that murderers made great traveling companions, but now that i've seen your tiny little yellow sign, all that has changed. two thumbs way uppp.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
mimi: too many decisions aka my life is hardddddd.
so, i got home from work today and did pretty much the usual for a tuesday evening (one of my designated no drinking days....yes, i need to designate these; dont hate). i cleaned up the dishes, paid some bills yo, anddd made a delicious dinner with salad and side dish! yes, i am officially a working girl, a yuppie if you will. i went to my (wannabe) ivy league school, got a steady 9-5 gig, and have pretty much settled into the next 50 years of my life....ughhhh, potential gagging occurring on this end.
so after i ate my dinner i had to catch up on some of the best shows out there aka 90210, gossip girl, and one tree hill. some of my friends and i obviously got together to watch rock of love bus and tool academy on sunday so those were taken care of. buttt i still needed to know if dixon finally told silver how annoying she was (yes, they broke up) and will annie and naomi ever be frenemies again?? what about chuck and blair, come on, that is a match made in upper eastside heaven and serena seriously needs to get over rufus and lily. parents need sex too.....ewww, but still. the best news of the night though, came when nathan made the winning assist for his new team, the chiefs....thank god too, because i think jamie was about to disown him or at least runaway to crazy nanny carrie, who is dead so actually that's not possible. as you can tell, i've had a very fulfilling evening.
then, a thought came to me. what if i'm just watching crappy tv that doesnt make a difference? how could the state of nathan and vanessa's relationship not matter you may wonder? well i'll tell you, and the answer is one simple word.....LOST. yes, lost, apparently is the god of all shows. every other show on tv should probably just give up and die come wednesday night.
now lost and i have a pretty sketchy past. he's like the guy i had sex with for a week but then stopped answering his calls because well, it was a new week and i was bored. the fact of the matter is that i did indeed watch the whole first season last may before i went traipsing through europe, but then, like i said, i went traipsing and well lost, and pretty much all tv, was unnecessary to life (i know it's almost a sin to say those words). when i returned to the states (lameness), everything was so hectic that i didnt pick the viewing experience back up. so i guess i didnt get bored, more so, i forgot. oops.
times are a-chaning andddd wouldnt you know, lost has made its way back into my life these past few weeks. all of my friends, and i mean ALL, are gearing up for the new season, the fifth season. apparently i am about three seasons behind, damn. they have been chatting about it nonstop, searching the web for theories and spoilers, and worst of all, they are planning to watch it together on wednesdays. the previously mentioned items either leave me feeling ignored (not cool) or physically leave me out (double not cool). i am not ok with any of this and therefore, i have a big decision to make. do i scrap all of my tv shows in favor of catching up with lost in hopes that i may be able to watch the end of season five with my lovers orrrrrr do i not hop on the lost train and instead, find out if blair gets into yale, which she better???? this is probably the biggest decision of my life....or at least of my week.
so i must a-get to contemplating.
later loves,
mimi
post script: if i do choose lost, i will obiviously catch up on all of these other shows over the summer when tv is at its lamest....so dont be too sad for me.
so after i ate my dinner i had to catch up on some of the best shows out there aka 90210, gossip girl, and one tree hill. some of my friends and i obviously got together to watch rock of love bus and tool academy on sunday so those were taken care of. buttt i still needed to know if dixon finally told silver how annoying she was (yes, they broke up) and will annie and naomi ever be frenemies again?? what about chuck and blair, come on, that is a match made in upper eastside heaven and serena seriously needs to get over rufus and lily. parents need sex too.....ewww, but still. the best news of the night though, came when nathan made the winning assist for his new team, the chiefs....thank god too, because i think jamie was about to disown him or at least runaway to crazy nanny carrie, who is dead so actually that's not possible. as you can tell, i've had a very fulfilling evening.
then, a thought came to me. what if i'm just watching crappy tv that doesnt make a difference? how could the state of nathan and vanessa's relationship not matter you may wonder? well i'll tell you, and the answer is one simple word.....LOST. yes, lost, apparently is the god of all shows. every other show on tv should probably just give up and die come wednesday night.
now lost and i have a pretty sketchy past. he's like the guy i had sex with for a week but then stopped answering his calls because well, it was a new week and i was bored. the fact of the matter is that i did indeed watch the whole first season last may before i went traipsing through europe, but then, like i said, i went traipsing and well lost, and pretty much all tv, was unnecessary to life (i know it's almost a sin to say those words). when i returned to the states (lameness), everything was so hectic that i didnt pick the viewing experience back up. so i guess i didnt get bored, more so, i forgot. oops.
times are a-chaning andddd wouldnt you know, lost has made its way back into my life these past few weeks. all of my friends, and i mean ALL, are gearing up for the new season, the fifth season. apparently i am about three seasons behind, damn. they have been chatting about it nonstop, searching the web for theories and spoilers, and worst of all, they are planning to watch it together on wednesdays. the previously mentioned items either leave me feeling ignored (not cool) or physically leave me out (double not cool). i am not ok with any of this and therefore, i have a big decision to make. do i scrap all of my tv shows in favor of catching up with lost in hopes that i may be able to watch the end of season five with my lovers orrrrrr do i not hop on the lost train and instead, find out if blair gets into yale, which she better???? this is probably the biggest decision of my life....or at least of my week.
so i must a-get to contemplating.
later loves,
mimi
post script: if i do choose lost, i will obiviously catch up on all of these other shows over the summer when tv is at its lamest....so dont be too sad for me.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
ali: a day in a nutshell.
the things that i did / read / encountered / happened to me today:
1. i called goodyear to tell them that i need to bring my car in for work. conversation is as follows:
mike: thanks for calling goodyear, this is mike.
me: hi, there are like 18 million things wrong with my car. can i bring it in tomorrow?
mike: sure. what's your last name?
me: (say it, spell it.)
mike: oh, hey, ali.
me: hi, mike. so i'll see you tomorrow?
mike: always a pleasure doing business with you.
mike thinks that i am actually crazy. the last time i took my car to good year, i number one did not have any gas, and had to ask him if the car had to be running to have the oil changed, because that was going to be a problem. number two, i told him that my car was lived out of and asked him to please not to judge me for the state it was in. in addition, he asked me if i wanted to have the air filters cleaned out, and i asked what those were and if they were important. mike and i clearly have a history. hopefully he will be thrilled to see me tomorrow. maybe we'll fall in love.
2. momma's boys season finale is next week, and it is going to be glorious. erica got saved by mike's mom tonight, and STILL no one knows that she is the penthouse pet of the year! word on the street is that she reveals everything next week, and i cannot wait to see it. the only thing that would make this show better would be a silent but snarky lie detector man, like on who wants to marry my dad? or maybe a clever, shit-stirring maid / butler.
3. currently, my religious views on facebook read "what would patty do?" in reference to my alcoholic, coked-out boss at work, also known as patsy, pattycakes, the cakester, and gail. however, without changing it, i have decided that this now refers to patty hewes, glenn close's character from damages. not only did she have a dog killed to prove a point, she is so saccharinely fake and vindictive it is almost unbelievable. she stops at nothing, and i want to be her.
4. i applied to adsense, google's program for putting click-through ads on websites. mimi and i will stop at nothing to make a buck, so if google says it's cool, there are going to be some serious ads on this blog.
5. the br is changing our discount policy starting feb. 1st. i don't have all of the details, but i don't need them. gap, inc. is a soulless profit machine and will stop at nothing short of physical abuse to take advantage of its employees and save a buck. ugh, strike one, corporate america - this week.
6. craigslist has got some sketchy job postings. if i wanted to be an actress in roles where “light bondage” are required, i would basically have a full-time job.
7. that fucking spider solitaire is so addicting that i'm not surprised that i never get anything done. i could play that for 6 hours at a time i think. and i think i may have. i mean, i've never timed myself, but i wouldn't be shocked if i played for over 5 or 6 hours at one point. i especially really like it when you can make a little pattern out of the order you finish the game in, like red-black-red-black, etc. delightful and satisfying.
8. bringing it back to facebook for a second (obviously one of my favorite topics), i recently updated my political views to: fusionism. my political views on the book have gone as follows - "Very Conservative" when they wouldn't let you type things in yourself, "way conservative." when they finally did, "ron paul 2012" after november 4th, and now "fusionism." according to wikipidea (the bible), "fusionism is an american political term for the combination of 'fusion' of libertarian and traditional conservative ideals in the american conservative movement." fusionism is, at its core, another word for classical liberalism, and the ideas of smith, locke, voltaire, et al. let's bring the good 'ole boys back and let them show modern american politicians how it's done. where is william f. buckley, jr. when you need him?
10. i think sarah palin is number one on every 10 or 20 or 50 or whatever "most hated people in 2008." you cannot even begin to count the number of problems i have with this statement. i will make only one point now - there are so many other people more deserving of that title that it's literally sending me into convulsions. has anyone heard of barney frank? take that asshole out for the reaming he so richly deserves. but, nooo, he's a democrat AND he's gay, so god forbid we insult the nation's #1 most put-upon congressman.
that's all for now, kids, i have to get my beauty sleep before my big date with mike tomorrow.
1. i called goodyear to tell them that i need to bring my car in for work. conversation is as follows:
mike: thanks for calling goodyear, this is mike.
me: hi, there are like 18 million things wrong with my car. can i bring it in tomorrow?
mike: sure. what's your last name?
me: (say it, spell it.)
mike: oh, hey, ali.
me: hi, mike. so i'll see you tomorrow?
mike: always a pleasure doing business with you.
mike thinks that i am actually crazy. the last time i took my car to good year, i number one did not have any gas, and had to ask him if the car had to be running to have the oil changed, because that was going to be a problem. number two, i told him that my car was lived out of and asked him to please not to judge me for the state it was in. in addition, he asked me if i wanted to have the air filters cleaned out, and i asked what those were and if they were important. mike and i clearly have a history. hopefully he will be thrilled to see me tomorrow. maybe we'll fall in love.
2. momma's boys season finale is next week, and it is going to be glorious. erica got saved by mike's mom tonight, and STILL no one knows that she is the penthouse pet of the year! word on the street is that she reveals everything next week, and i cannot wait to see it. the only thing that would make this show better would be a silent but snarky lie detector man, like on who wants to marry my dad? or maybe a clever, shit-stirring maid / butler.
3. currently, my religious views on facebook read "what would patty do?" in reference to my alcoholic, coked-out boss at work, also known as patsy, pattycakes, the cakester, and gail. however, without changing it, i have decided that this now refers to patty hewes, glenn close's character from damages. not only did she have a dog killed to prove a point, she is so saccharinely fake and vindictive it is almost unbelievable. she stops at nothing, and i want to be her.
4. i applied to adsense, google's program for putting click-through ads on websites. mimi and i will stop at nothing to make a buck, so if google says it's cool, there are going to be some serious ads on this blog.
5. the br is changing our discount policy starting feb. 1st. i don't have all of the details, but i don't need them. gap, inc. is a soulless profit machine and will stop at nothing short of physical abuse to take advantage of its employees and save a buck. ugh, strike one, corporate america - this week.
6. craigslist has got some sketchy job postings. if i wanted to be an actress in roles where “light bondage” are required, i would basically have a full-time job.
7. that fucking spider solitaire is so addicting that i'm not surprised that i never get anything done. i could play that for 6 hours at a time i think. and i think i may have. i mean, i've never timed myself, but i wouldn't be shocked if i played for over 5 or 6 hours at one point. i especially really like it when you can make a little pattern out of the order you finish the game in, like red-black-red-black, etc. delightful and satisfying.
8. bringing it back to facebook for a second (obviously one of my favorite topics), i recently updated my political views to: fusionism. my political views on the book have gone as follows - "Very Conservative" when they wouldn't let you type things in yourself, "way conservative." when they finally did, "ron paul 2012" after november 4th, and now "fusionism." according to wikipidea (the bible), "fusionism is an american political term for the combination of 'fusion' of libertarian and traditional conservative ideals in the american conservative movement." fusionism is, at its core, another word for classical liberalism, and the ideas of smith, locke, voltaire, et al. let's bring the good 'ole boys back and let them show modern american politicians how it's done. where is william f. buckley, jr. when you need him?
9. tha kath and i are playing phone tag - she is obviously screening her calls. typical.
10. i think sarah palin is number one on every 10 or 20 or 50 or whatever "most hated people in 2008." you cannot even begin to count the number of problems i have with this statement. i will make only one point now - there are so many other people more deserving of that title that it's literally sending me into convulsions. has anyone heard of barney frank? take that asshole out for the reaming he so richly deserves. but, nooo, he's a democrat AND he's gay, so god forbid we insult the nation's #1 most put-upon congressman.
that's all for now, kids, i have to get my beauty sleep before my big date with mike tomorrow.
Monday, January 12, 2009
mimi: numb??....i might as well be a furby.
would you rather be excruciatingly sad; sad to the point where it literally hurts to move, sad to the point where all you want to do is cry but there are no more tears left....or would you rather not feel it? you could be numb, no more feelings of despair. wouldn't that be lovely? no one could ever hurt you again...not a guy slash girl, not a friend, not your parents. you could just go through life sailing. basically floating on a cloud. it would be glorious, simply serene...right?
completely wrong. disgustingly wrong. just wrong with a side of wrong. ughh. who are these people that want to feel nothing? they are simply the worst kind of people in my opinion. you are put here to feel, to make an impact no matter how small. its people like this that make me preachy. ewwww.
i want to feel everything. i want to feel despair and i want to feel ecstasy and i want to feel so completely happy that i might burst. and i do almost every day of my life. i have high highs and low lows and even the best kind of blahs. i wouldnt have my life any other way.
so sorry for the dash of seriousness kids. side note to anonymous poster: ali's post about 15 minutes of fame only had a tinge of seriousness to it, not a gallon so cool your jets baby.
anyways later loves,
mimi.
post script: regular doritos are the shit and all of the other flavors are so unnecessary.....except maybe the buffalo ranch ones, mmmmm.
completely wrong. disgustingly wrong. just wrong with a side of wrong. ughh. who are these people that want to feel nothing? they are simply the worst kind of people in my opinion. you are put here to feel, to make an impact no matter how small. its people like this that make me preachy. ewwww.
i want to feel everything. i want to feel despair and i want to feel ecstasy and i want to feel so completely happy that i might burst. and i do almost every day of my life. i have high highs and low lows and even the best kind of blahs. i wouldnt have my life any other way.
so sorry for the dash of seriousness kids. side note to anonymous poster: ali's post about 15 minutes of fame only had a tinge of seriousness to it, not a gallon so cool your jets baby.
anyways later loves,
mimi.
post script: regular doritos are the shit and all of the other flavors are so unnecessary.....except maybe the buffalo ranch ones, mmmmm.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
ali: fame, fifteen minutes of
i want to be famous. no, not in the she's-a-huge-star-let's-stalk-her-and-dress-like-her way, but in the internet famous way. i want to be tila tequila without the bisexuality (though i wouldn't mind the mtv dating show). i want to be in us weekly just once, even if it's like on the worst dressed list or something.
andy warhol once said, "in the future, everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes." god, i hope that's true. if everyone had the experience of everyone knowing their business for just a hot second, i think people would calm down with the rumors and innuendo and whatnot. going to such a small college was sort of like being a celebrity among a small group of people because it took a complete stranger two phone calls to figure out who you hooked up with or what party you threw up at in a weekend. (not that i ever did any of those things, mom.) in all seriousness, i once asked a boy i knew in somewhat of a social experiment (to prove to someone that everyone knows everyone else's business), "how long would it take you to find out what i did this weekend?" he answered, "no more than two phone calls and 45 minutes, depending on if people are in class when i call." going to such a small school is both rewarding and frustrating - you get to feel like a celeb when you know people are talking about you, but the reasons they are talking about you are usually because you were blackout and falling all over or swearing at someone you don't know or making out with an ugly dude at a party. (not that i ever did any of those things either.)
it's frustrating to be anonymous. i want someone, anyone, to be genuinely interested in knowing what i did this weekend or why i wore what i did today (ps - what i did this weekend was lay in bed because i thought i was dying from a cold, and for those of you who were out tonight, the boobage was legitimately unintentional. the fact that the shirt is from abercrombie kids is besides the point.) no one will ever know that, though, because i am not internet famous. if more than 4 people read this blog, i would drop down dead in shock, i swear to god.
everyone needs their fifteen minutes. every girl wants to feel like she's in the limelight with people staring at her and admiring her; every dude wants to sleep with hot chicks. these two things generally tend to happen to famous people. it is a double-edged sword, though. remember when brad hooked up with angelina, and poor jennifer aniston found out with the rest of the world when the issue of us weekly came out? that had to suck. and once you're super famous, you can never be anonymous. i'm sure lindsay lohan doesn't love that literally aborigines in australia know that she's been busted with cocaine.
even so, the fact remains that everyone should feel famous, even if it's for no reason, just for a minute. and, hey, if my fifteen minutes happen to turn into something a little more substantial, i wouldn't object. just don't stalk me, and do write me an article on wikipedia.
andy warhol once said, "in the future, everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes." god, i hope that's true. if everyone had the experience of everyone knowing their business for just a hot second, i think people would calm down with the rumors and innuendo and whatnot. going to such a small college was sort of like being a celebrity among a small group of people because it took a complete stranger two phone calls to figure out who you hooked up with or what party you threw up at in a weekend. (not that i ever did any of those things, mom.) in all seriousness, i once asked a boy i knew in somewhat of a social experiment (to prove to someone that everyone knows everyone else's business), "how long would it take you to find out what i did this weekend?" he answered, "no more than two phone calls and 45 minutes, depending on if people are in class when i call." going to such a small school is both rewarding and frustrating - you get to feel like a celeb when you know people are talking about you, but the reasons they are talking about you are usually because you were blackout and falling all over or swearing at someone you don't know or making out with an ugly dude at a party. (not that i ever did any of those things either.)
it's frustrating to be anonymous. i want someone, anyone, to be genuinely interested in knowing what i did this weekend or why i wore what i did today (ps - what i did this weekend was lay in bed because i thought i was dying from a cold, and for those of you who were out tonight, the boobage was legitimately unintentional. the fact that the shirt is from abercrombie kids is besides the point.) no one will ever know that, though, because i am not internet famous. if more than 4 people read this blog, i would drop down dead in shock, i swear to god.
everyone needs their fifteen minutes. every girl wants to feel like she's in the limelight with people staring at her and admiring her; every dude wants to sleep with hot chicks. these two things generally tend to happen to famous people. it is a double-edged sword, though. remember when brad hooked up with angelina, and poor jennifer aniston found out with the rest of the world when the issue of us weekly came out? that had to suck. and once you're super famous, you can never be anonymous. i'm sure lindsay lohan doesn't love that literally aborigines in australia know that she's been busted with cocaine.
even so, the fact remains that everyone should feel famous, even if it's for no reason, just for a minute. and, hey, if my fifteen minutes happen to turn into something a little more substantial, i wouldn't object. just don't stalk me, and do write me an article on wikipedia.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
mimi: two topics = two times the fun
today i have come up with two orders of business to discuss. first off, name changing. i have some friends who have recently changed their names and others who are seriously considering participating in the process. my first reaction was why change your name??? it's your name you should own it, but then i thought about all of the lame names out there....and i quickly changed my mind. i mean we can't all be mimis (who are actually micheles - yes that's with one l).
so ali, since you are one of my friends considering the switch...i will help you with your search. for the record though, i do enjoy your original name and this is kind of annoying seeing as how we may have to change the name of the blog. here is my list of ten possible names for ali and why she should take them:
10. Pearla: simply due to your endearing childhood tale.
09. Lulu: what a great cartoon!
08. Smith: who doesn't love a first name that can double as a last name.
07. Smythe: because a "y" is always better than an "i" and "e's" are always appropriate for the end of words.
06. Apricot: gwenyth named her kid apple, hello fruits are fair game.
05. Stolie: i am actually just thinking of vodka, but i still feel this is appropriate.
04. Emmaline: it is my cats name and the name of an amazing ben folds song. i will obviously change my cats name if necessary.
03. Legume: i think this actually sounds pretty cool with your last name. (i'm not sure if i am supposed to disclose this information).
02. Bertrand: omg, i would adore calling you Bertie.
01. Baker: this is simply a good, androgynous name.
alright ali, i hope that helps you, but now i am ready for my next topic. it is quite a short topic so don't you all worry your little heads off about having to read for much longer...
last night some of my girls and i were chatting about weddings and all of them made the same, boring point. "i don't really know if i'll get married, but it would be fun to throw the party and get the dress." my ingenious response: "life's a party; buy a dress." aka i now have a new motto. enjoy it and if you quote me, please give credit where credit is due.
as always, much love,
mimers (pronounced meemers)
post script: well i have no post script, i just enjoy the phrase.
so ali, since you are one of my friends considering the switch...i will help you with your search. for the record though, i do enjoy your original name and this is kind of annoying seeing as how we may have to change the name of the blog. here is my list of ten possible names for ali and why she should take them:
10. Pearla: simply due to your endearing childhood tale.
09. Lulu: what a great cartoon!
08. Smith: who doesn't love a first name that can double as a last name.
07. Smythe: because a "y" is always better than an "i" and "e's" are always appropriate for the end of words.
06. Apricot: gwenyth named her kid apple, hello fruits are fair game.
05. Stolie: i am actually just thinking of vodka, but i still feel this is appropriate.
04. Emmaline: it is my cats name and the name of an amazing ben folds song. i will obviously change my cats name if necessary.
03. Legume: i think this actually sounds pretty cool with your last name. (i'm not sure if i am supposed to disclose this information).
02. Bertrand: omg, i would adore calling you Bertie.
01. Baker: this is simply a good, androgynous name.
alright ali, i hope that helps you, but now i am ready for my next topic. it is quite a short topic so don't you all worry your little heads off about having to read for much longer...
last night some of my girls and i were chatting about weddings and all of them made the same, boring point. "i don't really know if i'll get married, but it would be fun to throw the party and get the dress." my ingenious response: "life's a party; buy a dress." aka i now have a new motto. enjoy it and if you quote me, please give credit where credit is due.
as always, much love,
mimers (pronounced meemers)
post script: well i have no post script, i just enjoy the phrase.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
ali: what's stopping you? or, ten reasons why i should move back to nashville.
so, as much as i hate "new year, new beginnings" talk, it's a new year and a new beginning. without further ado, ten reasons why i need to take the plunge and just move already.
1. i hate buffalo. it's a dying city. yeah, it has its charm, but what it has in charm, it more than makes up for in homeless people.
2. mimi lives in nashville, obvs.
3. the highways are circular and that has always intrigued me.
4. i received a drunk v-mail from scott pierce last night that consisted mostly of him saying, "ali, move back to nashville, ali, move back to nashville."
5. at heart, i really just want to be a country music superstar, so nashville is the place to be.
6. vandy girls are attracted to their own kind. it's been studied, it's a fact.
7. people in the north are too mean.
8. potential pretentious film kid reunions.
9. big girl job?
10. i want to hang out with kathy conkwright, duhhhh.
there you have it kids, more reasons that not to move back to music city, usa. updates to follow.
1. i hate buffalo. it's a dying city. yeah, it has its charm, but what it has in charm, it more than makes up for in homeless people.
2. mimi lives in nashville, obvs.
3. the highways are circular and that has always intrigued me.
4. i received a drunk v-mail from scott pierce last night that consisted mostly of him saying, "ali, move back to nashville, ali, move back to nashville."
5. at heart, i really just want to be a country music superstar, so nashville is the place to be.
6. vandy girls are attracted to their own kind. it's been studied, it's a fact.
7. people in the north are too mean.
8. potential pretentious film kid reunions.
9. big girl job?
10. i want to hang out with kathy conkwright, duhhhh.
there you have it kids, more reasons that not to move back to music city, usa. updates to follow.
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